Even the Strong Lose Their Big Ask Sometimes
A client of mine runs a small business. I say small but it brings in over $3 million in revenue per year. Pretty successful woman, I’d say. Strong, successful, confident…..not the kind of woman who you would guess would be struggling to speak her truth and embrace her BIG ASK. But that is exactly what is going on with her right now.
She finds herself in a position where she is almost bullied by the very person SHE is paying to be her General Manager. Her directives are dismissed, her requests put him on the defensive and the business is NOT going in the direction she wants it to go. And she feels powerless to do anything. ” What?” I asked her in astonishment. “But you are the owner. You set the direction for the business and you get to make the ultimate decisions for the business. Don’t you?” She was silent for a moment.
Oh, There It Is
And then it was like a light bulb went off and she realized what she was doing. Or, better said, what she was not doing. She wasn’t speaking her truth. Her GM is a strong personality with military like directness, one of the qualities that made him good for the job. But his leadership style had triggered something in her that traced way back to her childhood and the strong/opinionated men in her family. She began shrinking in her role and allowing him to silence her. This mis-alignment was greatly affecting her stress level and even her health. And she was so close to it that she couldn’t see it. All she knew was that she was feeling very stressed, felt like she had to yell and scream to be heard and didn’t feel in control of her own business at all.
She realized that she needs to figure out how to communicate and manage her business according to her own values. The GM might not like this, but he will either need to get with the program or walk away. In either scenario my friend gets to run her business her way. After all, it’s her money, her legacy, her ASK on the line. Not his.
Where are you shrinking? Where are you not putting your BIG ASK out there? In my client’s case, it was costing her hundreds of thousands of dollars in lost revenue each year as the business slid backwards under this scenario. But it was also costing her her emotional and physical health, her contentment at home and her self-esteem.
Again, this is a strong, accomplished business woman. Not a push-over or shrinking violet.
Happens to All Of Us
We all lose our voice every now and then. And we just might be too close to the situation to see it. I believe in the power of coaching with all of my heart. And not just because I make my living this way. A coach is an objective, outside set of eyes that can see things that you are blinded to. A coach can help you reach higher levels of achievement and, in my specialty, help you speak your truth, embrace your BIG ASK so that everything in your life is in alignment with who you really are.
I invite you to leave a comment below and let me know if you are struggling to get your BIG ASK out there in any area of your life. And stay tuned for more information about my upcoming program, Embrace Your Big Ask.
Keep speaking your truth and showing off that big beautiful ASK of yours,